In the few times that i truly considered myself happy, i was totally devoid of apprehension. Not fear, or pain or anguish, apprehension. I think people are truly happy when they don’t have that feeling that something bad will happen, no matter what the circumstances may be in the present. Being the glass-is-half-empty type, have never truly felt at ease with life and its nuances.
Several events have sprung up that made me think that i may have better chances elsewhere. It certainly has me thinking a lot about changes— the question is, should i go through with this? Dialogue doesn’t seem to be an option at this point.
I wonder if it’s just caution, paranoia or perhaps a combination of both that spurs me to this manner of thinking.